One is a nice number, a fine number, a great starting place for a whole slew of numbers. Supposedly the loneliest number, One has plenty of friends among those who know what’s up.
Two is also a pretty fine number. Out of an infinite array of numbers, Two is the only even prime, which is really quite extraordinary. Way to go, Two.
Five is a great number for those who like counting by increments other than One. Other similarly gifted numbers are Ten, Fifty, and One Hundred. Out of these, Five is the best.
The word Four has the same number of letters as its value, which is a nice little fact to know. It also has the word “our” in it, because Four is a number for all of us.
Fuck Three. It’s stupid and useless and goddamn everywhere. Want a number of little pigs to be chased by a big, bad wolf? Three. How many billy goats gruff were there? Three. Goddamn it, fuck Three, stop using it, stop giving in to its demands, fuck.
What are you favorite numbers? Let us know in the comments!