Ireland’s Default is Rain – A Day in Bray Part Two

Turns out it did actually stop raining for a few minutes. We have photographic evidence.

Ordinarily, this would be underwater.

The rain continued on and off for the duration of the walk. Brillo got a bit wet while at the base of the hill.

Which causes him to lose focus and the world to shift slightly downward.

Water makes him cranky.

He tried to attack me in the most adorable vicious mauling ever.

By the way, the train in the background is the same one I took to Bray. These tracks lead from Bray to Greystones, and some consider this one of the most dramatic train rides in the world. It comes at a price, though – the line is nicknamed “Brunel’s Folly,” due to the perpetually high cost of maintaining a train line between an open ocean and a sheer cliff face. The moniker comes from civil engineer Isambard Kingdom Brunel, which is what I plan on naming at least six of my children and eight of my neighbors’. Have you ever heard someone tease a guy named Kingdom? Of course not, none survived.

Brunel, seen here with his watch chain and watch chain extension.

Shortly into the hike, we discovered the ruins of a Viking house. There was an information panel next to the building, but who has time for that when y-







We didn’t even have time to double-check if it was actually a Viking house, because we were too busy lo-





Real live Vikings!

The walk was gorgeous. Green, lush, and also colors that are not green.

Green, lush.


We decided to turn back when storm clouds approached, because if I’ve learned anything from watching James and the Giant Peach, it’s that storm clouds may contain traces of rhino.


[I have no idea what sound a rhinoceros makes.]

Sights on the way back:

It's still not a mountain.

I had the man in there for scale, because I love offering counterarguments to my own arguments.
(It’s still not a mountain.)

The town.

The town [fixed].

Oh, yes, and I promised you guys some signs. Here they are:

I’ll take two, please.

Warning: Falling Delaware.

The most condom-dispenser-looking non-condom-dispenser I’ve ever seen.

I also promised a terrifying bathroom, and it is this one:

“Safety helmets must be worn” is not a standard bathroom sign no matter what country you’re in.

Lastly, I promised to show you the Best Bar in the World, but I didn’t go there because my jet-lagged face almost fell asleep in my dinner, so here are some selfies instead. Why should Brillo get all the love that he deserves so much more than I can ever hope to?

This is me being artsy and wet.

This is me not realizing I took a selfie, and also being wet.

This is me smiling before the Infinite Void, where wetness and dryness are one and the points do matter.

Well, that wasn’t as self-affirming as I had hoped.

You don’t need to see my nightclub photos, so here’s a creepy church instead.

This is definitely the last photo I took that day. No more. Goodbye.

I can’t wait to get back to Bray. Highly recommended sightseeing for anyone visiting Dublin. It’s an easy, quick train ride away, and the hike is more than worth it. Next time I hope to actually make it to the top, so I don’t have to answer questions about what the summit looks like.


2 responses to “Ireland’s Default is Rain – A Day in Bray Part Two

  1. I have to admit, I haven’t kept up reading your blog as regularly as I used to, but I picked back up when you headed overseas for some partially self indulgent looking at pictures of Ireland and cause you’re so damn funny. If you liked Bray I recommend you head out to Howth (Bray of the North) They have a fantastic weekend market and you can buy fish to throw to seals which congregate in the harbor and are all cute and stuff. Also a lovely cliff walk out there and great food!

    Annie G
    (Bankus 2010-11)

    • I forgive you for straying, Annie. As with the prodigal son, I will always welcome my followers back with open arms. Just try not to worship too many false blogs.
      In any case, good to hear from you. I’ve heard lots of fun things about Howth, and I do love throwing fish at seals. I’ll try to make plans for the week-end. Hope you’re well and are surrounded by many hedgehogs.

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